It ain't rocket science but the moneys good...



I must admit to following the transfer news - and rumours - that surround the prospective signings coming to Paradise next season with the dedication of a stalker. As soon as names like Rivaldo's were thrown into the mix, my curiosity peaked. Alas - or perhaps fortunately - the big R won't be pulling on the hoops next season, but who will be? The latest player to be linked with Celtic is Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink - particular attention should be paid to the first two syllables of his surname - who has a year left on his Chelsea contract. I read somewhere that he earns 80k a week at Chelsea so one can only hope any move to Glasgow's East end would be a loan deal with Chelsea paying the lions share of his wages. Now - step back for a minute - 80,000.00 pounds a week! What's that about?

Surely 80k could be better invested. Ah mean, it's almost enough to buy a Zeigler Carpet which would give a better return than JFH when sold in a years time. Until last month it would have bought a Jack Vettriano painting, which could now cost 10 times that amount. What about a Flat in Leith or Gorgie, guaranteed 10% per annum increase for your investment. Perhaps a Porsche 911 Carrera 4 Coupe S would be more to your taste, certainly better looking than JFH. Bearing in mind that JFH could buy any of the above items for around a weeks wages - reality check please. Although, if inclined to do so, even Jimmy would have to save up to buy John Lennon's Guitar.

News just in: Celtic have been linked to Wee Davie Robertson, who has been released from his club - The Backgreen windae Brekkers - after turning up pished for training. Positives for Wee Davie are he will play all week for a few pints & a Ruby Murray every Friday night. One of the snags in the signing could be the fact that he's Shite - although it wouldn't be the first time - would it.

Ok. Repeat after me P-E-R-S-P-E-C-T-I-V-E...